We buried my grandfather this weekend.
Yeah, Happy New Year, right? I’m trying not to be cynical. I’m trying not to be selfish in my sadness. I’m trying to be strong. But I’m so sad that I can hardly breathe. I’m having a hard time finding a smile in anything…not in my husband (although he is trying), not in my children (for they are mourning too, which breaks my heart even more), not even in the Church–or a collar, for that matter. The truth is I miss him already. Terribly.
I’m not going to tell you he was a perfect man. He was not. He was simply a man. Like all of us, he was flawed in some ways, wonderful in others. His sense of humor was amazing, and he loved us grandkids (and his great-grandchildren) with a pure heart. It saddens me to know I’ll never again hear, “What’s on your tender mind, little girl?” (Of course, who wouldn’t love being called ‘little girl’ at age 32, right?)
His funeral service was beautiful, and surprisingly, I actually learned things about my grandfather that I had never known before. Continue reading